Waiting Game

It's been a long few days since my confirmation of breast cancer last Thursday. I've had panic attacks, crying jags, and lot's of anxiety. I'm trying to keep it together at work and home so have been telling people the news by email. Totally impersonal but I can keep my emotions in check. Hopefully once I start treatment and feel proactive it'll be easier for me to talk.

Everything has happened quickly. I had had a mammogram in March with was read as normal, but it seems my breast tissue is dense and difficult to read. I went to my doctor two weeks ago after feeling something, she sent me to the breast clinic last Wednesday, they did an ultrasound and biopsy same day, sent me for another mammogram on Thursday and had rushed the path lab so had my biopsy results an appointment after the mammogram. It was all positive (really should be called negative shouldn't it? there's really nothing positive about it!) They weren't happy with the clarity of the new mammo either so sent me for an MRI on Friday

I'm scheduled to meet with the full breast clinic team at UMass Memorial on Wednesday (tomorrow.) Hopefully I'll receive my full prognosis and will be discussing potential treatment options. Two of my sisters will be with me. Preliminary conversations with the surgical oncologist have shown that I'll definitely need surgery, radiation, and chemo but, I don't know in what order or to what extent until I meet with the team of doctors.

I have many fears swirling around in my head. I wish the meeting were today....

Edited to add. I was digging around on the web and found this great blog, reading it has really relaxed me about the appointments tomorrow and it's also given me some good questions for the doctors. http://fighting-breast-cancer.com/